My brother-in-law stayed with us again recently for his interviews for medical school and was listening to the talk by Elder Bednar titled The Tender Mercies of the Lord. I told him I'd listened to it before, but resolved to do so again as soon as possible. Listening to the talk reminded me of a tender mercy I received from the Lord last year at an LDS adoption conference. After we decided it was time to start considering adoption, we wanted to see what all our options were. We attended a non-denominational adoption and foster care conference in Rock Wall that was really amazing and opened our eyes to the possibility of foster care and/or international adoption. Then we attended an LDS adoption conference here in our home town. It was wonderful, but the best part was the panels. We had 3 birth moms speak to us, and 2 families who had adopted through LDS family services. It was very touching and eye opening for us to learn about the adoption world right now.
I think the thing that was most amazing and so not a coincidence, but what Elder Bednar refers to as a tender mercy of the Lord was meeting another couple. Elder Bednar explains that tender mercies of the Lord are not coincidences, but they testify to us that the Lord is aware of us because of his timing. We were considering not even going to the conference since we weren't sure if we would be able to adopt through LDSFS since we have two kids but we decided to go since it was the last free conference, and we figured the information couldn't hurt.
At lunch, we met a couple and the girl has the same medical issue as I do! We were both astonished there was someone out there like us because it is more likely that you'll get struck by lightening than to become rh negative, especially being a caucasion with health insurance. My doctor said it happens in places where women don't have good medical care, but it's unheard of for someone like me, or my new friend:) On top of that, for us to meet each other at an adoption conference and live in the same metroplex was totally a God thing. I knew that was why we were supposed to go.
This process has been hard since the day we found out that I got sensitized when I was 7 months pregnant with Jackson. Since then, it's been a wonderful, but a hard journey. Most women will think I'm crazy for saying this, but I think one of the things I feel sad about is not having experienced a real, "normal" birth. I always wanted to have a natural birth, and go full term, but both my kids were taken so early and I never went into labor. I still yearn to be pregnant again, but since it's not meant to be, I just need to remind myself how lucky I was to be able to carry my two sweet kiddos as long as I did and that they both made it here alive!
I was reading the Ensign today too, about young women who were deciding whether or not to go on a mission, and I have felt some of the same feelings of fear and doubt regarding adoption as they did about going on a mission. I have to remind myself that faith and fear cannot coexist. I must move forward with faith, believing in Christ and that with him all things are possible. It sounds lovely, but I am not always fear-free. I know that things will turn out just fine, but the process and the unknown scare me. I am grateful for the tender mercies of the Lord I've received so far, and know that in His time, all my righteous desires will be fulfilled, and in an even more fantastic way than I could ever imagine.
I think the thing that was most amazing and so not a coincidence, but what Elder Bednar refers to as a tender mercy of the Lord was meeting another couple. Elder Bednar explains that tender mercies of the Lord are not coincidences, but they testify to us that the Lord is aware of us because of his timing. We were considering not even going to the conference since we weren't sure if we would be able to adopt through LDSFS since we have two kids but we decided to go since it was the last free conference, and we figured the information couldn't hurt.
At lunch, we met a couple and the girl has the same medical issue as I do! We were both astonished there was someone out there like us because it is more likely that you'll get struck by lightening than to become rh negative, especially being a caucasion with health insurance. My doctor said it happens in places where women don't have good medical care, but it's unheard of for someone like me, or my new friend:) On top of that, for us to meet each other at an adoption conference and live in the same metroplex was totally a God thing. I knew that was why we were supposed to go.
This process has been hard since the day we found out that I got sensitized when I was 7 months pregnant with Jackson. Since then, it's been a wonderful, but a hard journey. Most women will think I'm crazy for saying this, but I think one of the things I feel sad about is not having experienced a real, "normal" birth. I always wanted to have a natural birth, and go full term, but both my kids were taken so early and I never went into labor. I still yearn to be pregnant again, but since it's not meant to be, I just need to remind myself how lucky I was to be able to carry my two sweet kiddos as long as I did and that they both made it here alive!
I was reading the Ensign today too, about young women who were deciding whether or not to go on a mission, and I have felt some of the same feelings of fear and doubt regarding adoption as they did about going on a mission. I have to remind myself that faith and fear cannot coexist. I must move forward with faith, believing in Christ and that with him all things are possible. It sounds lovely, but I am not always fear-free. I know that things will turn out just fine, but the process and the unknown scare me. I am grateful for the tender mercies of the Lord I've received so far, and know that in His time, all my righteous desires will be fulfilled, and in an even more fantastic way than I could ever imagine.
1 comment:
This must so hard for you, but I'm happy that you are feeling Heavenly Fathers hand in your life. I'm praying for you Jess. Any child would be so blessed to be in your family!
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